What goes around, comes around. I have finally lived long enough for the term “Black” to become acceptable again. When I grew up in the late 50s, the term “colored” was used and, at the time not considered offensive. Then, based on the very important civil rights’ changes which took place in the 60s, the appropriate term in the media became “African-American.” Now, the term “Black” is considered appropriate to signify a race and culture. This is an important change, considered to be respectful.
Whites have been mostly referred to as “Whites.” I am sometimes uncomfortable with that term since for many it denotes a class of priviledge, and because I have an interracial family.
I am still concerned about other racial groups in America, including Hispanics and Asian Americans, as examples. There are only derogatory terms describing these groups related to their color. I guess I am still wanting us all to be “Americans” and be respectful within that designation of the many, many variations of background and race, especially as many Americans are multi-racial.
With each day that elapses, growing bored with the homebound menu is a significant risk. My husband and I are both outstanding cooks, using a theme approach for each night of the week but varying the menu within, including Marinara Monday, Taco Tuesday, Wegetable Wednesday, Thirsty Thursday, Pizza Friday, Seafood Saturday, and Special Sunday. Differentiating Saturdays and Sundays from Monday through Friday was increasingly a challenge since retirement but we began the weekday brunch out and weeknight meeting of friends in restaurants to keep our lives interesting.
Now, having been on home lock-down during the current crazy episode in this country, we have missed wine-pairing dinners with friends, quiet gatherings with our best friends, and not one brunch in a restaurant. Everything here has been closed, including the beaches, for two weeks. Fourteen days of breakfast, lunch, and dinner at home and home-cooked has begun to be a bore. Forty-two meals of our own creation. Now we are trying to create foods to crave. The problem is we are eating more and the meals include more homemade biscuits and bread. I have signed up for foody newsletters and downloaded dozens of new recipes. Given that at a minimum this containment approach may go on for another month, 90 more healthy homecooked meals are out of the question!
Comfort food is what is needed!
Up until a week ago, I had not even given much consideration to my age or any societal implications of my health. Being active has been a choice many Boomers made as much for enduring youthful delusion as for a healthy lifestyle choice. Then, boom – the Boomers became the “elderly” and in some countries apparently expendable in these times of the C-virus, not the “C” that afflicts many but gives you a chance with many effective treatments.
I can barely listen to the admonitions of these sweet looking young ladies prattling on about the global health crisis and the disproportionate impact on the elderly which is apparently now anyone over 60 years of age. My parents died when they were elderly – 89 and 93! That is old and a life well-lived!
Our children, the Millennials, are suggesting we stay at home, stockpile toilet paper, get our medications refilled, and have a plan on occupying ourselves so we don’t become depressed and lonely. I received a call from a kindly older lady from a local senior center. While well-meaning I had to say I was nearly gasping to not guffaw. She wanted to know if I was okay and did I have activities to keep myself busy. We chatted for a while and she said she and another volunteer had taken three sheets each of names, where she got them I have no idea and were calling to check on the elderly. I am only 70, the new 40 I thought 🙂 Just before hanging up, she asked if she could arrange Senior Meals on Wheels deliveries. She was so caring and sweet and I was touched by her kindness.
I am touched by my children’s kindnesses and concerns as well.
But, we are living in an ageist period which is becoming coarse and publicly insincere, translating age into a criterion for treatment if very ill, access to travel opportunities, activity level, and the enjoyment of entertainment options.
Boomers will make it through this current frenzy in the world and America. I plan to be around to be truly elderly, maybe outliving my parents’ generation!
Sorry, this is a rant…a long and annoying story of repairing the aging body to function at a reasonable level…
In November 2018 I was completing physical therapy to improve neck range of motion, knee strength, and balance. During the last session the therapist decided to have me do a sled type pull which at the time seemed fine.
The next day I could hardly walk on my left foot due to shooting pains coming from the metatarsals on the top left foot. I went to my GP who suggested I go to a foot doctor. Living in a resort, the pickings are slim. I found a nurse practitioner at my prior foot surgeon who X-rayed the foot and said, the ” I think it is a sprain” refrain. I had previously broken my metatarsals on my right foot and was fairly certain of my own diagnosis.
Finally in May I found a podiatrist. Who did additional x-rays and said the metatarsals were broken and I needed surgery. He performed a tightrope procedure with wire and screws. Within two weeks it appears the wire stretched and the procedure was a failure. The recovery for the surgery was 8 weeks until I was able to walk, with the same level of pain I have had for a year.
Now, I am just mentally and physically restoring my cheery outlook on life, and waiting for my mind to make a decision about my body.
Interval walkers showed the most improved cognitive memory! Let’s keep moving!
Today while participating informally in the church coffee hour, I was waiting in a short line for the regular coffee (our church attendance was only 44 today as it was pouring rain and windy), two gentlemen were chatting. One of them turned to include me in their conversation and opened with a real conversation stopper. He asked if I was afraid to die? I paused and turned the question back to the two of them. Both smiled sheepishly and sort of demurred to answer directly. I answered, “No.” They seemed to find that mildly amusing. I was a bit surprised that they seemed more concerned than me. We had just had a sermon on the pious church-goer v. the repentant and grateful tax collector. I would have thought neither of them would be worried as I perceive them as active and moral living people.
My philosophy is best summed up by Isaac Asimov:
Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It’s the transition that’s troublesome.
If your dish is over seasoned—say, too salty or too spicy—we have lots of solutions that can get things back on the right track, from bonus toppings to dilution.
— Read on food52.com/blog/10046-how-to-save-an-overly-salty-or-spicy-dish
We have all had too salty food and tried the old potato truck. It doesn’t work! This article offers many suggestions for help around a typical kitchen!
The next part of the sentence is, “When you are there.”
Every visit to family comes with the good, the bad, and the sometimes uncomfortable. With more free time on our hands, visits to adult children and their families are more frequent, often to see the grandchildren and to enjoy holiday celebrations. The consequences of these visits can involve the inevitable dispute among spouses. Sometimes these are overheard accidentally but on occasion these unfold before your very eyes. I had particularly boisterous parents so I have an aversion to displays of anger, apparently a learned response as a child.
Having an acute sense of impending doom, I try to escape these moments with undue haste. Sometimes, like a tornado, one can be trapped.
On a recent visit to one adult child, the spouse and their mother became embroiled in a brouhaha. It was like a car accident. I wanted to look away but there was no where to go.
This weekend visiting another adult child, the couple became involved in a somewhat heated discussion when I had made my way out to the outside deck to straighten up somethings and observe a little pumpkin carving with my grandson. Trapped outside, not wanting to intrude, I waited patiently for the storm to subside.
Now, these are uncommon and the convergence of these two episodes, remind me of my more youthful days. Age provides perspective…and less energy for life’s dust ups.
Our democracy today is dominated by the old, and young people are getting a bad deal.
— Read on www.nytimes.com/interactive/2019/10/18/opinion/old-age-president-2020.html
Isn’t it time for young people to assume leadership and generate energy in this country so we have a fresh start representing the coming demographics?
Recently we received a call to ask, very gently, if we would be able to come to the west coast for a month or so to assist with our three-year-old grandson. The explanation was very simple and straightforward. Our son would be away for a work assignment for an extended period of time, perhaps a month or more, and he was unable to come home at all. In a split second, we changed our plans and booked arrangements. Suddenly I felt personally uplifted, valued, and excited about the trip.
About a week before we were to leave, another call came indicating his work trip was canceled. Wow! But we were graciously re-invited for a “grandson” visit. What a fantastic dilemma, spending money unexpectedly but having quality time with our grandson. Who could resist? An unplanned time having fun, laughing, watching him, sharing family meals again, experiencing non-stop sunshine!
Off we went to Southern California but for only ten days. Precious and wonderfully unexpected.